madermouse's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 10/4/03 I am soooo excited for those of you who decided to join me in my �Mouse�s October Challenge�!! Woo HOO!! Way to go Nancy, my friendly stalker, who took the challenge within minutes of the posting. (That�s my girl!!) There was only 7 of you, so far, and I�m still waiting for the rest of you to get off your butts and make that commitment to your health! Remember that the challenge doesn�t have to be 8 pounds.....that�s just MY goal! The challenge can be whatever you want it to be - to stay within your calories, to exercise 5 days every week this month, to lose that last 2 pounds... Whatever you want your challenge to be, that�s what I�ll support you in. Make it realistic - PLEASE!! I hate to see any of you set yourself up for failure by choosing something that is simply impossible. Keep it real. I�m in the process of creating a web page with all of our goals, names, e-mail addresses & web address�s on it....so be patient. It should be up by tomorrow or Monday at the absolute latest. That still gives you plenty of time - so DON�T DELAY ANY LONGER! Make that commitment to challenge yourself this month. Just do it! My mother, bless her, sent me this card. On it has a little stick drawing of a mountain and an �X� which stands for you. The card reads; �Imagine in your head, the story of a very brave person who is capable, brilliant, and talented. In front of that person stands a very large mountain. She must climb this mountain in order to reach her goal - the valley of dreams which lies just on the other side. See that person approach the mountain? She is all determination. She has overcome similar obstacles before. Watch her now as she begins to climb. ---This is your story. It is you against that mountain now. Go find your valley of dreams. You ARE strong, I tell you. You CAN do it!� She signed the card with �Way to go Heather feather....we are so proud of you! - love, mom� This card really made me think about a couple of things. First off, it was so thoughtful of my mom to send me this card to let me know that she was proud of me, that she was still supporting me after all these months. I wonder if others have this kind of support? I can only hope that if you can�t find this kind of support with your family, that you seek out others who have also struggled with their weight who can help you along the way. I feel extremely lucky that I�ve surrounded myself with people who are only cheering me on, giving me the �thumbs up� sign. And I�m thankful I had the courage to start this website, and pretty much bare my soul to all of you. The return for my efforts has been unmatched. And then I thought about the actual words on the card. �It is you against that mountain now�, it reads. This statement is so true, in that we must all OWN our fat. Part of the healing process is recognizing the problem, and being aware. I know I�ve talked about awareness a lot in these pages, but I still think its one of the most important factors of success. I spent so many years of my life in pure denial. I knew I was fat - after all I did live in my own skin. I felt the harsh stares (and still do) of my peers, I experienced the humiliation, the limitations of my weight. But I still kept eating...and eating. The relationship between a person and their fat is often a divided one. So often a fat person knows they are fat, but feels thin inside. And it isn�t until we cross paths with a storefront window, that our reflection surprises us with what we already know. You can read more about mirrors in an older entry, here. When I say that we must all OWN our fat, I mean that we must take off all of our blinders. We must truly look at ourselves with bare, honest eyes. We must own our fat. We must make ourselves aware that it is part of us, and we are a part of it. We must make it ours. Trust me, when you do that, the burden of carrying that extra weight becomes heavier, more real...and suddenly the prospect of carrying that load around with you for the rest of your life becomes dispiriting. I know from experience. So, for those of you who are reading this site and just �thinking� about possibly changing your health, I urge you not to wait. Find your support system, build it up around you, make yourself aware, own your fat, and realize the truth. Within each of us, is the power to change whatever it is about ourselves that we don�t like. Believe it. On a side note, the strangest thing is happening in my pants. No.....its not what you think - sicko! But I think my underwear are getting too big!? Just one of the many benefits of losing weight....a load in the pants. 12:57 p.m. - 10/4/03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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